Doubts

            Smith ran her fingers through her hair, looking distraughtly at the frog that was perched on top of her work table.  How it had even found the place she worked at, she didn’t dare to guess, but it had found her, nevertheless.

            “You know why I’m here, Ms. Smith.”  The frog croaked.  Despite not being human, the frog had an air about him that reminded Smith of those stereotypical government agents that pop up in all kinds of movies.  She suppressed a snort of laughter as she imagined him with sunglasses and a badge.  Laughing wouldn’t help the situation at all.

            “Are you serious? You’re a frog!  How did you find my job? Isn’t there some other woman out there you can pester for romantics?  Go ask Lucille, she’s gullible enough to go through with this.  Why me?”  Smith tried to keep her voice down while still conveying her intense frustration at the frog.  If anyone saw her talking to this thing, she’d have to have another meeting with Mr. Lowry.  Last time they met, he said he’d fire her if she had to come in one more time.  This was not good.

            “Ms. Smith, you are the only one in the world with the right kind of magic to break me out of this curse. I’ve told you this countless times, and you still refuse to be the good Samaritan.  You Americans…” The frog shook his head with apparent disdain for Ms. Smith’s decisions thus far.

            “That’s just some line of crap you got from reading fairy tales, and you expect me to just go along with you? You’re a frog!”

            “Yes, you said that already. But if I am merely a frog, how did I read those fairy tales?  Regular frogs can’t read, you should know that, what with your expertise in frogs and everything.”

            “I will NOT be mocked by a frog! You have a point, though. If I do this, will you leave me alone?” Smith asked, running out of options and time.  If this frog would just go away, she could go back to her life.  Sure, there were cameras around, but anything can be doctored now.  And it wasn’t as though her reputation could sink much worse than it already had, after announcing that she was a vegan.  Why did everyone look down on vegans, seriously? She never understood that.

            “Absolutely. I want this to be over with as much as you do. Frogs are not allowed to drink Starbucks coffee. I’d sue for discrimination, but I cannot find any lawyers willing to work with a frog, either. It’s truly an awful existence.” 

            Smith contemplated a life without lawyers or expensive coffee, and struggled to find a downside.  She struggled very hard, if only for a minute or two, and finally concluded with “What the hell, I’ll give it a shot.” And gave the frog a quick kiss in the top of the head.

            “Thank you!” the frog croaked, as it began glowing like a rave party.  It slowly rose into the air, rotating as it did so.  It shook violently, and a flash of light permeated the entire office space.  When the light subsided, an albatross sat exactly where the frog had been perched just moments before. Smith quickly grabbed it by the neck, and threw it against the copier on the other side of the cubicle.

            “What the fuck?! You give me this spiel about being human, and you’re really an albatross?” She screamed, momentarily losing any cares about not looking like she was talking to animals again.

            “I thought I WAS human! I had my doubts, but I really thought I was!  How am I going to get some Starbucks now?  I don’t remember being a bird before, but can you blame me for trying?” If a bird could smile sheepishly, Smith had a feeling this one would have.  That didn’t help its case at all, though. She was still going to be fired when Lowry found out.