A Strange Ritual

            “Ay hahahaha… Ay hahahaha… Ay hahahahaha” Larry heard through the walls of his shitty little studio apartment.  This happened every fucking Tuesday at around 5:20 pm.  He had hoped that it was a one-time thing the first time, but he kept hearing it every week.  Larry had no idea what went on over there, but it was annoying.  The chanting would continue for an hour or two, it always did.

            Larry had never seen his neighbors, couldn’t point them out of a crowd, and he figured now was a great time to introduce himself.  What could they possibly be doing?

            Larry donned his best bathrobe and exited his apartment.  One door over, and he knocked on it.  A trap door quickly opened below him, and he fell to his death.

Summer Nights

            “You see? This is why I don’t like summer nights. Shit like this right here.” Castor said as he leaned in towards Lila.  They had come out of their apartment to watch their neighbors get drunk in the dog park across the street. The neighbors were getting increasingly rowdy, and Castor was wondering how long it would take them to start breaking things. It won’t be long, now, he thought, hearing them yelling demands for matches and newspaper.  “Summer nights are never just quiet, relaxed, and easy. You tend to get stuff like this happening all the time that disrupts your peaceful thoughts, and turns them a bit more homicidal.”

            “Why can’t you just enjoy what’s happening, Castor?  Seriously, you bitch and moan about every little thing that goes wrong. If I wanted to date an emo, I would have gone for a guy that wears skinny jeans. Life is supposed to be enjoyed, not endured.” As she said that, Lila got up, and started walking away.  Castor heard her keys jingle as they were retrieved from their hook on the wall.

            “Wait, where are you going?” This evening had been a bit unsteady, but she didn’t usually just get up and leave like this. “The socks bother you that badly? I didn’t know they were that important to you, I’ll fix it. Just let me!” Castor’s pleading did nothing to stop Lila’s strides out the door, and he was left on the balcony by himself. Sighing, he said to himself “This part is what I truly don’t like about summer nights.” With resignation, he went back inside, turned on the tv, and watched MTV until his brain was numb.

Windowless Trapped

            Jerry woke up and looked around.  How did he get into this room with no windows or doors? Why did his head hurt? Surely the two were related, but did anything have something to do with the intense whiteness of the walls and floor? It was too early to tell.

            “On that note, what time is it?” Jerry asked no one in particular. He hoped someone would hear him.  What did soundproof walls look like, again? He thought these looked kind of like the walls of a trailer a few of his friends lived in, but he wasn’t sure.  Either way, it couldn’t hurt to have someone out there possibly hear him. Maybe there was a way in/out that he couldn’t see.

            The more he looked at the ceiling, the more it didn’t look right. What was up there? It wasn’t the same oppressive white that covered the walls and floor, but rather a weird kind of blue that could be seen as white if you screwed up your eyes and looked at it really hard.  This even sounded weird to Jerry, but he felt that what he was looking at wasn’t really a ceiling. He couldn’t tell what it was, if not a ceiling, but the whole surface just seemed off to him.

            “Hey!!” Jerry yelled, not sure what else to do. There wasn’t much of anything else to do, maybe someone was watching to see how he reacted.

            Sure enough, a slot in the wall to Jerry’s right opened up, and a pair of beady eyes stared at him through it. They eyes looked at him, winked, and disappeared.  A black marker was pushed through the slot, which then closed back up, leaving Jerry very disappointed.  He sat down, considered his options, and finally decided what to do.

            With a resolute sigh, he walked over to the wall, picked up the marker, and played game after game of tic-tak-toe with himself.  X’s and O’s gradually morphed into 3’s and 7’s, then pacmen and nail guns.  As he went on, the tic-tak-toe boards started weaving into each other, reminding Jerry of zebras.  He wondered if zebras ever played tic-tak-toe, but became distracted when he realized that he had beaten himself, yet again, at this infernal game.

My Thoughts Become Me

Today, I found my head.

I’d thought it was gone, for sure,

But it was just hiding

Under the bed

With the other monsters.

I’m glad it’s back.

It had this weird smile

As I brushed off the dust

And screwed it back on.

Kinda makes me think it planned this whole thing out.

But it’s just a head,

Those things don’t plan.

Everyone knows that.

I asked it where it had been,

And it just said,

“Oh, you know, around.”

That didn’t really help, though.

Round shapes are around all the time,

So where the hell had it been?

Still no answer,

I can’t think straight.

Maybe I didn’t

Screw it on the right way.

Is it on tight enough?

It thinks so, yes.

I’m not so sure, though.

Oh well,

Time to talk to people.

Ugh, those people!

They keep talking,

Spewing nonsense and idiocy,

Can they hear themselves,

Is it just me?